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Hey All,

My little sister (my only sibling) is getting married later this year, and I had volunteered to shoot the wedding if they wanted me too, and they said if I didn't want to that was ok etc and it was a bit strangely akward since usually my sister and I are on the same wavelength.

Now I've had a number of people question or suggestion I shouldn't be shooting the wedding as it wouldn't prevent me from enjoying the moment or sharing the experience etc Originally I argued that I get to be more invovled by being the photographer, but at the same time I recognise I'll be trying to get the shots etc so it might not be as relaxing as just being part of the audience. Then I think, well because I know the bride and groom, I should have a much better rapore then a photographer that doesn't know them as well.

Then I'm left scratching my head wondering. Should I take a step back and let someone else do the photography ? Or should I celebrate my Sisters big day by capturing the best shots I can so they have a lasting memory of it ?

Thoughts, ideas ?


Thanks,
Craig

My thoughts:
I think it should come down to what your sister wants and what you are comfortable with.

It is a big day (for the entire family) and I can see how being the photog could hamper your enjoyment and involvement in the day's events.

A good wedding photog should be able to quickly establish a good rapport with all involved (which is part of being a successful wedding photog), so I personally wouldn't worry too much about that.

Perhaps if circumstances allow (and the wedding photog agrees) you could be a 2nd shooter on the day...which would give you a chance to contribute to her photo collection of the day, it will give you some experience in this field and most importantly, it will free you up to enjoy as much of the day as possible (with your photog's hat OFF).

If they prefer you take the photos and don't want to pay someone else to do this, then you need to make sure you are prepared to miss out on much of the day (as you will become pre-occupied with taking the best photos you can)...which would be your job, but counteracts your other job as brother, brother-in-law and family member..
You would need to take shots of your sister and bridesmaids at their location, shots of the groom and groomsmen at their location, get to the church (or wherever they are getting married) and capture the grooms (and most importantly the bride's) arrivals, setup and be ready for her entrance etc.
Then afterwards, family and group shots, followed by bridal party shots somewhere, then back to the reception to setup for the arrival, the ribbon cut, the cake cut, speeches, first dance, misc shots throughout the night, garter and flower toss, exit from reception and then home to sleep
That would be similar to a typical wedding photog's day....though this might vary depending on the wedding plans, locations, what your sister wants etc...

I will soon be in the same boat as you as my Sister gets married in Nov 2011 and they want me as the photog. In my case I know she doesn't want anyone else and I am happy to do so and forego losing part of my participation in the day to do this for her.
It also means that I get to give her such a personal gift that no-one else can buy her...

Things to consider!

Dave

Alpha_7 wrote:Then I'm left scratching my head wondering. Should I take a step back and let someone else do the photography ? Or should I celebrate my Sisters big day by capturing the best shots I can so they have a lasting memory of it ?

Hi Craig

The simple answer is: "Yes".

Seriously, I would consider the following:

1. If you are the shooter, are you going to be celebrating the wedding or 'working'? If the latter, to what extent will this impact on your ability to enjoy the day;
2. If you are the shooter, will you charge anything?
3. Would they be able to afford a professional shooter at or better than your level?

I don't know the family dynamics, but I suggest going as a guest. Part of the reason is based on the belief that the professional shooter should be able to create the repore with the bride & groom. Also, if you are the shooter, how would everyone feel if....they were disappointed with your shots (you know what I mean); if tension flares up between you and your sister/future brother-in-law (for whatever reason); etc? These issues shouldn't happen with a professional...well, they shouldn't...

Put simply, it is a conflict of interest.
Take a camera by all means, but let someone else be responsible for the "official" photography.

It would be a different matter if they were not going to bother with a photographer recording the event.

Mr Darcy wrote:Put simply, it is a conflict of interest.
Take a camera by all means, but let someone else be responsible for the "official" photography.

It would be a different matter if they were not going to bother with a photographer recording the event.

Reschsmooth wrote:Hi Craig

The simple answer is: "Yes".

snip

Reschsmooth wrote:flares up between you and your sister/future brother-in-law (for whatever reason); etc? These issues shouldn't happen with a professional...well, they shouldn't..

I was in teh same boat with my sister last year - I merely explained there is significant differences between a hobby photographer and a pro wedding photographer

I think the second tog option would be the only wise move if you had your heart set on it.

I'm with Patrick, Greg & Gerry. Go as a guest and let another photographer handle the stress. As already said if it goes pear shaped and YOU are the photographer well .....

Take one camera and ONE lens (or even your point and shoot) and do what every other guest does - take some happy snaps

Craig,

Go as a member of the family.

You should be there to enjoy yourself and share in the festivities. As the 'tog in residence, will you be able to do that?

What if you need to make a speech? Who'll be taking the photos while that's occurring?

I'm with the general consensus....and would definitely take a camera and maybe a few lenses to snap a few for myself.

Wedding tog's can get a bit protective, so do make sure you let them know.

Way back in the days of film, my brother asked me to shoot his wedding because he couldn't afford to hire a pro.

I did it, but I should have employed a photographer on his behalf.

The stress was enormous. I don't remember the wedding, but I remember the stress of the photography!

I would also agree with the crowd. Kick back and enjoy the day as a guest. Everyone seems to take photos at weddings these days, and sends their best ones to the bride and groom.

My brother got married last year, and although I watched the main photographer pretty closely (trying to pickup tips and tricks), and even helped him out a bit, I was glad that he was on the business side of the camera. I was able to relax and enjoy the day.

My brother-in-law got married later in the year, and although I was not the main tog, my mother-in-law asked me to take a few snaps of her grand kids and other things like that. The person who was doing the photography, started shooting over my shoulder to get the poses I had setup. That made me smile.

Hope you have a great day, whatever you choose to do.

I would suggest to go as a guest. Take a P&S or something small. Have a few beers and enjoy. Let someone else worry about the dim light...