the history is that we suffered a couple of miscarriages starting about 18months ago and has been a very difficult time especially for lara. i buried myself in work pretty much to get my head around everything. photographically, the handful of gigs i was doing turned into 1 or 2 every weekend, kids, weddings, (never thought i'd do it !!), portraits. i couldn't do enuf. i shot for quite a while with a 5DmkII, a MKIII and loads of canon goodies because i was a smidgen away from dumping the lot and going to the other side.
very fortunately and by the grace of God Lara gave birth to healthy twins about a month ago on the 22/8. Alexander and Zachary are 2 pure blessings and although life has been completely different since they arrived...we couldn't be happier.
as with all things in life, it wasn't meant to be easy was it ? on the 21st of august, the day before the twins were born my dad, at 73yo, suffered a massive heart attack. this is his 2nd heart attack...his first was about 15 years ago. when they assessed his heart back then they found lung cancer and once they got his heart working, he started on chemo and raditaion therapy immediately. he has been a 4 pack a day smoker since age 15. he never stopped smoking thru chemo. wtf is up with that ?
back to the story...he was in cardiac arrest for 20minutes before the ambos got there. yeah...that's right 20 F'ING minutes ! fortunately where my old man was voting there was a doctor who administered CPR for the whole time and even though he had no pulse she never stopped. once the ambos got there they hit him with the juice 3 times before they got a pulse. by that time, he had been in arrest for 28minutes. no oxygen, no pulse, no breathing. rushed to bankstown hospital and into ICU where he remained on life support and unconscious for 3 days.
on day 5 he regained consciousness but couldn't speak or move. the doctors told us that this was the best that we could expect. 28mins with no oxygen to the brain meant that he was effectively brain dead. at this stage we are all living in a state of intense emotional conflict. happy with the twins...shattered about my old man. i struggled going between hospitals each day...couldnt fully be excited about the bubs and couldn't fully grieve about my dad.
on day 6 the doctors asked us to remove the breathing apparatus...if he couldn't breathe of his own volition then what was the point ? we agreed....he wouldn't want to live like this. they removed the tube and all artificial breathing assistance. we said our goodbyes and hoped he'd be alive the following day.
on day 7, he survived the night but the doc said his breathing was quite weak and he was likely to get pneumonia because he didn't have the strength to remove mucus from his lungs. still no response. no speech, no movement.
on day 9 he started to move but it was unclear if it was intentional.
on day 11 he looks my mum in the face and says "agapi mou" which means "my darling" in Greek. he also says "water".
on day 12 some fucking moron rigs up his feeding tube wrong and the liquid diet goes into his lungs. he degenerates immediately. we are in disbelief that Dad has effectively come back from the dead and the NSW heath system may kill him yet...
on day 14, it is Fathers Day. he seems to have recovered from the NSW health error and he decides to speak. we have a conversation albeit a very disjointed one. movement is purposeful, but weak.
he continues to improve every day...7 days ago he got up and started to walk a few steps. so we get to today...i visit him in hospital where i find him outside reading the paper. he has the shits cos some nurse was telling him to move a ball from one cup to another. he asks her if she thinks he's a moron and then tells her to go away and do something useful with her life. he asks me about the twins, we have a pretty normal conversation and then at the end of it he says "go and get me a pack of smokes." yepp...he's pretty much back.
why am i sharing this ? hmmm..hard to say...its cathartic maybe ? most of all cos i miss having the odd chat with y'all and thought i'd share where i'd been and what i've been up to ! oh...and i dumped all the canon gear, (still missing the 135L which is my most fave lens EVER), and picked up an 85/1.4G which is everything, (almost), i wanted the 85D to be. it is a sublime hunk of glass. the 24-120/4 and 35/1.4 are next on my list.
hope everyone is doing well, look forward to catching up now that the roller coaster has slowed down a little.
a couple of our rottie coming at me at speed...
